It’s Valentine’s Day and it’s a snow day. The kids’ cards are all ready and packed in their backpacks. This morning we baked heart-shaped cookies for the class parties which are now going to take place tomorrow. This afternoon we’re going to venture out though we may rush back in quickly for hot chocolate–it’s cooooold out there!

Tonight we’re going to have our usual celebration: dinner (pink food: ham and a Lithuanian beet salad we like which is also very pretty, along with sparkling grape juice for the kids and the real stuff for the adults) and a few small gifts, books and chocolate, the like. Low-key and relatively non-commercial. Babysitters and dinner reservations are a bear to get this night anyway and my husband and I hate crowded restaurants. Even in the BK (Before Kids) years we usually had an intimate dinner at home. We eat out at other times. And what we do afterwards isn’t something we don’t do the rest of the year either.

Which gets me to the root of my Valentine’s cynicism: I have overheard married guys say it is their big night for the year. I could further ponder whether the ritual wouldn’t occur without the customary offerings of heart-shaped boxes of chocolate and diamond pendants. I find that anything but romantic.

But I wonder if this holiday has its uses. I bet some of these men who enjoy complaining about married life really do love their wives but are too embarrassed to find unique ways of showing it. I suspect the average American male (if there is such a thing, of course) likes a script: the chocolates, the dozen roses, the pendant. It doesn’t necessarily mean the feelings aren’t genuine. Some of the grumbling is just backhanded boasting, maybe.

Still, isn’t it amazing when guys take a chance and do something original? In romance novels, especially historicals, men seduce their ladies all sorts of ways. I’ve always thought I would melt if someone sang to me or composed a poem to my fine eyes. But I won’t hold my breath waiting for my husband to break out in verse. He does buy me books, gives good massages and makes me gourmet sandwiches invented from whatever is in our fridge and pantry. The best thing is he does these things for me year-round.

So no, Valentine’s isn’t a big romantic deal for me. OTOH it’s not a bad way to liven up a doldrumy sort of month.

So what do you think? Do you love or loathe this holiday, or something in between? Are you doing anything special? And if you could imagine the ultimate romantic gesture, what would it be?

Hoping fantasy and reality aren’t too far apart, that everyone stays warm and safe, and wishing you all a happy Valentine’s Day!

Elena 🙂
www.elenagreene.com

P.S. Make your own Valentine’s candy heart image at www.cryptogram.com/hearts/.

Hello, I am Elena and I am a compulsive reader of self help books for writers.

Last weekend at a writers’ workshop I saw Natalie Goldberg’s WRITING DOWN THE BONES in the stack brought by the co-leader of the workshop. I couldn’t resist borrowing it and diving in. (In my defense, I have rewritten a chapter and a half while reading it so I am not completely dysfunctional.)

I found it interesting and unsettling. While I loved Julia Cameron’s THE ARTIST’S WAY, Natalie Goldberg’s style and suggestions go further, making the control freak in me very uncomfortable. I also get the feeling that some of her ideas lend themselves more readily toward the writing of poetry and short stories than to novels. Still, I think there are things there worth trying.

A major theme is “writing practice”, doing free writing in notebooks (with goofy pictures on them to keep one from feeling pressured to create masterpieces in them). My reaction to this idea was something like, “And how is this going to help me complete a manuscript to send to my agent in mid-April per plan?” But I’m trying it, just 10 minutes here and there, as a warm-up. I also think it might help keep me from getting rusty during the months when I’m doing early drafts, when I concentrate on story rather than writing. Anyway, it’s been fun. I even wrote a poem, only the second I’ve written since school. No, I promise I won’t inflict it on you! 🙂

Another of Goldberg’s suggestions is to write in different places, outdoors, in restaurants or cafés. There are lots of examples of writers penning bestselling novels that way (J.K. Rowling for one). Some writers need to get away from household cares, or they like stimulation, or they feel trapped behind a desk. And it sounds so very chic and sophisticated to write in a café.

But it doesn’t usually work for me. When I started writing my first novel I tried out different locations: libraries, cafés, parks, and found that I was always too anxious to get much done. I’m better off hiding in my “writing cave” (albeit a well decorated and comfy one) where no one can look over my shoulder or interrupt me and I can forget there’s an outside world that might not love my characters as much as I do.

When you read a book, do you ever think about whether the author wrote it sitting in some chic café (like this one in Paris) or at home in her jammies? For the writers amongst you, have any of you read Goldberg? What do you think? Do any of you do practice writing or keep journals? Do you write in the same place every time or do you like to change the territory now and then?

Elena
www.elenagreene.com

This past weekend I had the chance to co-lead a writing workshop for some aspiring writers aged 10-12. I had a great time doing it and what a fun group it was!

But one thing that struck me was how each of the girls admitted to having been at times ridiculed or somehow labeled by peers at school and elsewhere. Hippy, goth, nerd, brainy freak: these were some of the assorted terms used to brand them as different, and not in a good way. Some of them reported teachers who must have felt threatened by the differences. One girl was told she couldn’t have spiders and cats talking in a story–um, Charlotte’s Web, anyone????

The co-leader of the workshop and I could recalled similar incidents from our own youths. The girls seemed happy to know they were not alone and not crazy (or at least crazy in a good way). 🙂 Afterwards I reflected that while my writer friends and I have, by and large, found our places in various communities as adults, many of us were somehow “different” as children. These differences were not always appreciated by either our peers or our teachers. But while painful memories can block us, they can sometimes slingshot us into the work and provide source material. It’s no wonder books and films are full of characters trying to cope with being different.

In romance we see a lot of “misfit” types: bastards (whether or not they turn out to be the Lost Heir), heroes with shady pasts, heroines who are hoydens or bluestockings, characters with physical imperfections or even disabilities. I love ’em all, as long as they are unique creations and not imitations of someone else’s misfit character.

Not all heroes and heroines are misfits, of course. Sometimes they get together because of a threat is to the community they’re both part of, or they belong to different communities. Interesting things also happen when one fits in better than the other.

Anyway, here are just a tiny few of my favorite misfits from historical romance:

• Phoebe in Georgette Heyer’s SYLVESTER: she likes horses better than most people, acts like a hoyden and writes a novel featuring the hero as a villain. Her foil, Sylvester, on the other hand, is the perfect duke, obviously welcomed everywhere.
• Lady Alys Weston from Mary Jo Putney’s THE RAKE AND THE REFORMER (a.k.a. THE RAKE). She’s a tall woman with mismatched eyes, thinks of herself as a “great horse” and holds the unusual position of estate manager. The hero, Reggie, is an alcoholic trying to save himself. It’s ironic to me that while some characters thought he took his drinking too far, it was a very socially acceptable vice. Reggie isn’t really the one who doesn’t fit in.
• The hero and heroine of Loretta Chase’s MR IMPOSSIBLE are both misfits after a fashion. Rupert is a ne’er-do-well younger son who doesn’t know what he wants to be when he grows up. Daphne is a scholar with a fascination with Egypt and ancient languages.

Having been the nerdy kid with cat’s eye glasses and her nose in a book, I know exactly why I relate to misfits. What I do wonder about is why they are so very popular. Are there really that many misfits who are readers? Or are there “normal” people out there who secretly relate to the misfit?

So why do you think misfits are so popular in fiction and on screen? Do you have any personal favorites?

Elena
www.elenagreene.com